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GODLY FAMILY
2022-05-08 14:33:51 152  

Godly family
(Colossians 3:18-21)               by pastor Jimmy                   May 8, 2022

Today I will talk about family, why wife should submit to her husband, and why husband shouldlove his wife, and lastly the role of parents to their children.

What was God¡¯s original design for the family? Sadly, when thinking about family, many don¡¯t have great memories. In the Scripture, there are only four chapters without sin (Genesis 1–2 and Revelation 21–22), and therefore even the Bible has many tragic stories about families. It shows the devastating effects of sin on the family.

Adam and Eve sinned, and Adam responded by blaming his wife. They parented two male children, and one of the sons killed the other. Abraham, God¡¯s chosen man, married two wives, breaking God¡¯s design, and he eventually kicked one wife and her child out of the house. Jacob married several wives like his grandfather. His twelve sons eventually sold their younger brother into slavery. David too espoused many wives and his son raped his sister. Then the daughter¡¯s brother, Absalom, killed the son that raped her.

When we consider the biblical narrative, we see many family relationships that were broken by sin. Today¡¯s story is no different; sin still destroys family relationships, and therefore we don¡¯t have great models of God¡¯s design. In fact, today we even see the effects of sin in the redefinition of marriage. In some cultures, men take many wives and in other homosexual marriage is acceptable!

Paul began Colossians 3 talking about believer¡¯s new position in Christ. He said, ¡°we have been raised with Christ and advised us to set our hearts on things above.¡±¡°When you were saved, you were spiritually identified with Christ. you died with Christ; you rose from the dead with Christ. You are now seated with Christ in heavenly places (Eph. 2:6). However, this position should not for information only; it should radically change your life. Including your family relationships, your position in Christ should affect every thought. Including your thoughts about your relationship with your wife or husband, relationship with your children and your relationship with your parents.

How should your position in Christ affect your family life? In this lesson, we will see the responsibilities of the family members in God¡¯s original design.

The Wife¡¯s Responsibility to Her Husband

Why submit? because it is fitting in the Lord or this is the right thing to do in following the Lord.  It is appropriate for your position in Christ. The word submission does not mean ¡°inferiority.¡±Submission in Greek means 1) to arrange under, to subordinate, 2) to subject, put in subjection, 3) to subject one¡¯s self, obey, 4) to submit to one¡¯s control, 5) to yield to one¡¯s admonition or advice, 6) to obey, be subject.

Submit is actually a military word. A sergeant is not inferior to a captain. As a soldier, they are equal. However, to have order in the military, authority must exist in the relationship or problems will arise. In the same way, when God made the husband and wife relationship, he made it with order so that it would function properly. In Christ, we are all equal. However, our equality and unity in Christ does not remove our roles. Wife¡¯s role is to submit. Otherwise, family will be destroyed.

Why is the woman called to submit to the man? Let us look at the Trinity relationship. They are all equal in everything but Christ submits to the Father. He obeys the Father.Jesus¡¯ crucial aspect of his deity is authority and submission in the Godhead, which is also reflected in the marriage union. When God made male and female in His image, he puts authority and submission in that relationship. This unity and authority in the marriage is a reflection of how mankind is made in the image of God. When a wife submits to husband, she is reflecting the character of Jesus Christ as Son of God.

Another reason why woman has to submit because by nature men are aggressive. He has the need to command, to perform, to take the lead, and to show strength because of the nature of his manhood. If you notice, mostly leaders are males. Even anti-Christ are males. Look at the aggressiveness of young boy compared with his sisters. Male is more aggressive even to his older sisters. Man wants action. Boys form gangs and attempt to dominate competitors. The aggressiveness, dominating, and competitive nature of men is reflected also in animal kingdom. To rule, the male has to fight numerous battles. Other males maybe allowed to remain within the herd, but they must respect the domination of the leader. Females may fight, but they don¡¯t seek for dominance. They are only aggressive in protecting their young or getting of food. Wives, if you want trouble and chaotic family, don¡¯t submit to your husbands! Don¡¯t act as king when you are a queen!

Submission is in the context of love. One of the beautiful aspects of the Trinity is that God the Father does not dominate or force Christ to submit to Him. Submission and authority happen in the context of God¡¯s love for the Son. Because of love, the Son submits.

Husband¡¯ responsibility  to wife 

Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. Two important commands here: 1) love your wife and 2) not be bitter against them. The Greek word of love here is agapao which means to welcome, to entertain, to be fond of, and to love dearly.

There are a lot of broken family because husband do not welcome his wife. In other words, wife do not feel comfortable with him. She felt she is not a wife, but a helper and sex object. She feels that she is not part of the family. He is not affectionate to her. He not is caring and loving. He is numb (manhid). Too much work and forget that she has a wife. Husband know all the interest of your wife and support her. There is nothing wrong with that. For example, if your wife loves flower or taking pictures, then support her. That is the meaning of ¡°to be fond of¡± Woman has so many interest that needs husband¡¯s support and approval. You have to love her greatly and extremely, sincerely and deeply. If you do these things, submission of your wife is not a problem. You will see there is ¡°give and take¡± relationship. Because your wife feels your love and secured, she will submit to you. Stop acting as a boss to her! As husband you are not called to demand that your wife submits to you. You have to love her, care for her, encourage her to grow in God, and serve her. Your wife will submit to you willingly; you cannot force it. Let her feel your love and she will eventually submit to you.

Don¡¯t be bitter to them. Meaning, husbands do not be harsh to your wives. Don¡¯t be tough to them. Let every husband be filled with cherishing love for his wife and never be insensitive toward her (TPT). Women are very sensitive; their brain is not same with men¡¯s brain. They always ask WHY? They wanted details. Women¡¯s blood contains more water and less red cells which resulted to less oxygen available to body cells. This condition results in quicker physical fatigue and faints easily. Women has greater emotional variations, thus, they laughs and cries easily. Women have larger stomachs, liver, but smaller lungs. Upon conception, she needs nutrition and minerals for her and the baby. During menstruation and child birth cause loss of tissue and blood which have to be replaced. She releases a lot of energy during birth, but it is just the beginning, especially when the child is hyperactive. There is joy in caring children, but the joy does not replace the consumed energy. When she talks, listen because that counts a lot to her. She needs to release 50,000 words a day. It seems there is a small machine in her mouth. Women experience a cyclical pattern of emotional ups and down. Be careful when your wife is silent.

Parents and children relationship

If parents fail to discipline and guide their children into wisdom and to pay attention to wise instructions (Prov.19:26-27), your children will become foolish. In the Bible, the word foolish means fool, stupid fellow, dull, and arrogant one. As a consequence, they will give you much grief (Prov. 10:1). They will become heaviness to the parents. A son who no longer gives attention to teaching is turned away from the words of knowledge. In other words, if they stop listening to instructions, they will keep making stupid mistakes. If you want to see their mistakes just go outside and observe young people. At early young age they smoke a lot. They engage in premarital sex. They went home very late. Reason? They don¡¯t like the environment in their house. Maybe there is no peace and love.

When children need discipline, parents should not avoid their responsibility, because the consequences are dangerous to the child. Prov. 19:18 says, ¡°discipline them while there is hope.¡± Meaning, discipline them while they are still young, and capable of being reformed. You know why parents should discipline their children? Because foolish ways or foolishness are deep-seated in the heart of a child. Foolishness is in the inner man, in their mind, in their will, in their heart, and understanding. Is there a chance for them to be away from foolishness? YES! The rod of correction will send them far from him (Prov. 22:15b). Do not withhold correction from a boy, for if you strike him with the rod, he will not die. You shall strike him with the rod, and you shall deliver him from hell (Prov.23:13-14).

What are we going to do as parents? Everything is in the Bible. Let me share. Children are blessed if they have a father who is honest and does what is right (Pro.20:7). In one word, integrity or wholeness. Father¡¯s responsibility here is to walk with integrity. Train up a child in .the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it (KJV). In this verse parent¡¯s responsibility is to train the children or teach them in a way that fits their needs. The promise here is when they grow up, they will not leave the right path (Prov.22:6). Love and trainings will protect your children from this evil society. This evil society has so many wicked individual, religious people, unbelievers, demonic organizations and dysfunctional families that produced bad children. They are pulling out your children away from you. Satan knew the power of the ¡°next generation principle¡± He does not want your children to be successful. He wants them to be a failure.

If we don¡¯t train our children, when they grow up, they will not respect you. Instead, they will curse you. As a result, child¡¯s life is like a lamp that goes out on the darkest night (Prov.20:20). Meaning, they will struggle because they will be walking in total darkness. Undisciplined children walk in total darkness. That is one of the reasons why we have difficulties in evangelizing them. 

The Bible gave warning to those who mess up families. God hates anyone who causes family members to fight (Prov. 6:19b ERV). Here is another verse, ¡°those who cause trouble for their families will inherit nothing but the wind¡±(Prov. 11:29a ERV) Wind here means nothing. I have a friend, an elder of the church, working as high position in the government, but when he died, he died like a rat because after his retirement, he left his family and live with another woman.

Godly family follows authority and order. Let us follow God¡¯s words, and we will be successful. Yes, we failed a lot, fight a lot, but it is not the end. It is part of adjustment as family. The memories we make with our family is everything. Everyone needs a house to live in, but a supportive and godly family is what builds a home. Being a family means you are a part of something very wonderful. Family is like braches on a tree; we grow in different directions, yet our roots remain as one. We don¡¯t choose our family; it is God¡¯s gift to us.

 

  JESUS WHO LOVES CHILDREN AND TREATS THEM AS VALUAB
  RESPONDING TO SPIRITUAL DECAY
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